The name of this cheese reminds me of how an old friend of mine was beaten up in the middle of the street. He and a friend were looking for a pub and he forgot that his Chinese friend’s name sounded exactly the same as the word ‘coon’ (albeit spelt differently) and he shouted up the road for the friend to “come here”. It took us a long time to clean him up as he repeated a mantra of “How could I be so stupid?”

Of course, different definitions aside, Coon cheese is a now famous brand of cheese in
Australia and if you wish to know more about them, please visit their official website:
www.naturallycoon.com.au

INGREDIENTS:

1 packet of Tasty Coon (extra tasty if you prefer)
2 slices of bread. Preferably white, thick and seemingly dense
Salted butter for spreading on the slices of bread
1 jar of vegemite
Some feathers for decorative purposes


INSTRUCTIONS

Place the bread on a clean board and spread the flat sides facing you with a generous layer of the butter (margarine would be good here if you prefer), using a normal knife from your cutlery draw. Make sure that the butter goes right to the edges here, as it will make all the difference later on. Next take your coon out of the fridge and, using a small sharp knife, slash the wrapping so you can remove the coon completely. Using the said sharp knife and a steady hand - the other one stopping the coon from moving when you least expect it- cut six thin to medium slices off in a series of smooth motions. Doing this puts you at the least risk of injuring yourself.

Now the bit where you can let your creative juices run wild! Place cheese slices in any formation on one of the buttered sides and place the other buttered side on top, encasing the coon in the dense white bread.

Press down hard to seal.

To give the coon sandwich its final flourish, open the jar of Vegemite and carefully cover the outside of the sandwich with a medium layer. You should use about 3 tablespoons to do this, depending on the size of your bread. Make sure that you only hold the sandwich with one hand, to keep the other one clean for the next step. Take some white feathers and put them on a large platter in a thin layer. Then, place the now brown sandwich on the feathers, pressing them on the vegemite to cover the top, bottom and sides of the form. There is the finished coon sandwich... enjoy!

Download the current composite recipes here